I Wish That I Was As Strong As I Look


A familiar theme in my past journals is that I wish I was as strong as I look.  It seems unimaginable that I could keep my emotions of fear (or anything for that matter) hid so deep inside.  I can still do that at some times, but I work on being healthier and letting those feelings out – and to talk about them.  I have had the ability to have a pounding heart and be filled with anxiety, yet still appear relaxed to the point that others around me feel more relaxed due to my calm presence.  But the healthier part of me now says release those emotions.  Talk to someone.  Pray!

Prayer helps so much and releases a lot of my burden.  I put my feelings and all of the future actions into God’s hands.  It’s a beautiful thing.  And to remember that I’m never alone is so peaceful to my spirit.  There have been times that I’ve said, “Who can I call?  Who can I talk to?”  Then I realize God is always available.  And I pray.  And peace overcomes me.

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