I have gained more acceptance of my fate in life with the understanding that I need to be diligent in my medical/psychological care. I have to make a conscious effort and be proactive in being mindfully healthy. Yet, I still rely on the help of others. Even to be outwardly open about my struggle with mental health and my Bipolar is a positive step for others to see and understand that there is no need to have UNWARRANTED shame, related to a difficult illness that is hard to control.
To have delusions, delirium, and to be locked up against your will, and be forced to take medications. Or worse yet, to be held down (against your will) and be shot up with these mind altering meds is a loss of total control over one’s own body, mind, and will. You are once again a child that is being pushed around (an abused child) and being assaulted. I do know in my heart that the goal is good, but the way it is completed is NOT! Your spirit and will are taken away. There must be a better way.
So therefore I’m going to think about the alternative. If perhaps I was not held down and given these meds to control my delusions, word salad, hallucinations, and other (I believe) stress related induction of symptoms, I would be lost in my own world, or worse yet, I would be dead from where my mind could have taken me. So yes, the treatment is unfair, though it is not unkind. In my state of chaos, my mind and eyes are seeing evil, but in the reality of the situation control is trying to be established so that a solution or treatment can be instilled.
Therefore I have to remind myself that although the methods of care have not yet been perfected to make the one with mental illness feel soothed or under careful attention and comfort, the goal is to be healed. An empathy to understand one going through this treatment is a must. It is a painful experience to endure. Please remember that these individuals feel a loss of control and dignity. A therapist and advocate needs to be put into the situation immediately.