The thought of changes in medications for me, due to a weight gain problem, has me ambivalent with my feelings. I am happy that I will be going back to a medication that worked well for me in the past. However, with my recent problems and break in reality, it causes concern to make any changes at all. First of all, I believe that a significant rise in my weight would cause terrible depression, so therefore I’m ready to take the risk. But the thought of a break or psychosis causes terrible anxiety.
So, as frequently happens with therapy sessions, I find myself asking, “What’s the worst that could happen?”. With hope and faith, I find myself saying, “Well the worst that could happen is that the med change is not suitable for me. I know the signs to look for and so does my family, and we will cautiously watch and monitor – before anything becomes a serious issue”. That being said, truthfully with a break in reality what is the worst that could happen? I could lose my freedom by being locked into a psychiatric facility (for my well-being). I could lose the ability to think rationally or logically. I could lose relationships due to erratic behavior that seems threatening to others. There can even be an indefinite amount of time that this could occur. So to ask what is the worst that could happen is not a good way to think of things. And to further say that I’ll roll with the punches and take it as it comes is NOT reasonable to me. Because what the worst could happen is NOT a reasonable or logically alright alternative to nothing. What is alright to happen is to catch a problem before something destructive happens. Yes, destructive!!
So with faith I will take this change and watch myself and ask for the help of loved ones to help monitor my moods with this change. There has to be an anticipated response before something destructive happens because the alternative is NOT acceptable! My health and happiness for the future is what’s at stake. This is not a take it as it comes kind of attitude. It is a more of an acceptable tolerance of mood status and maintaining a level of homeostasis (and yes, happiness).
So, what’s the worst that I will allow to happen is a more suitable question. And the answer to this is slight changes in mood, but no extremes. Keeping a step ahead of any problem is the goal!
© Can Stock Photo / dizanna